December 23 in the news.....
- Simon Cowell became the highest paid British TV star of all time. Second place remains Bill Oddie. A distant third remains the other Goodies.
- More than 30 motorists were caught drink driving during a major crackdown on Melbourne roads last night. There were eight re-offending drivers, eight female drivers and 24 male drivers over the legal limit. The eight re-offenders listened to their mates about short cuts that 'avoided the breathos mate'.
- Macy's has pulled from its shelves and its Web site two styles of CEO and rapper Diddy's Sean John hooded jackets, originally advertised as featuring faux fur, after an investigation by the nation's largest animal protection organization concluded that the garments were actually made from a certain species of dog called "raccoon dog." Coincidentally, raccoon dogs are renowned for their cotton picking.
- Speaker-to-be Nancy Pelosi cited the need to preserve the ''dignity and decorum'' of the House as she rejected a request Friday that C-SPAN operate its own cameras in covering the chamber. When pressed further, Pelosi said they always have a habit of filming from an angle and therefore the risk is apparent of them covering her 'bad side'.
- Somali Islamists said today they have captured a frontline position from Ethiopian-backed government forces, as a fourth day of bloody battles raged in the lawless nation's southern region. Both sides continue to pose for Western aid commericals with flies all around their exposed ribs.
- North Korea's official media today placed the blame for an impasse in talks aimed at ending Pyongyang's nuclear weapons program squarely at the feet of the United States. North Korea's official media also blamed them for no casinos to gamble in and the non-existent karaoke scene.
- The Queen's televised Christmas message is being offered as a podcast for the first time. This excited teenagers all over Britain.
- Russia has doubled its price of gas to Georgia, in an apparent retaliation for Georgia striving to become more pro-EU. The Russian President, Vladimir Putin, commented on the move saying "it's in line with market prices.... for cunts who do not fear us as much anymore."
