December 26 in the news.....
- An overwhelming majority of Australians would be prepared to drink recycled sewage to help ease a national crisis in urban water supplies that has forced escalating restrictions on water use. Flavoured cordials are expected to take off if this happens, with Orange & Mango & Shit expected to be a big hit.
- James Brown the Godfather of Soul died at 73 on Christmas Day. The hardest working man in showbusiness is now none other than Frank Stallone.
- The South Korean government is handing out gifts for office workers who promise not to visit brothels this holiday season. The ministry is offering movie tickets based on the number of employees who pledge not to visit prostitutes as well as a cash prize of 1 million won ($1,077) for the company which enlists the most employees in the campaign. When asked for comment one South Korean office worker said "movies or drunken sex? It's going to be a tough choice this year."
- Ethiopia attacked retreating fighters from the air on Tuesday and threatened to seize their stronghold Mogadishu after a week of war in the Horn of Africa. Ethiopia is dedicating its victory to starving Africans everywhere.
- Shane Warne proved again there's no better show-stopper in cricket by turning a milestone into another bag of wickets at a packed MCG. Warne became the first man in history to take 700 wickets, when he bowled England opener Andrew Strauss, who was the first victim in a haul of 5-39. This still leaves him 300 short though, of how many women he's slept with while he was married.