Wednesday, August 29 in the news....
- Aussie Rules footy stars have begun to issue bans against Channel 7 after it broadcast details of players drug taking using allegedly stolen medical records. AFL players have also refused to buy their drugs from anyone who watches Channel 7 too.
- President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad on Tuesday brushed off a warning by Nicolas Sarkozy that Iran risked being bombed over its nuclear drive, saying his "inexperienced" French counterpart did not know what he was talking about. "He (Sarkozy) only recently came to power and wants to find a place for himself in the world. He is still inexperienced," Ahmadinejad told reporters. He continued, "As for me, well, I have a few Presidential notches on my jock strap let me tell you."
- The Foxtel network has been embarrassed after showing a documentary on Adolf Hitler written by Holocaust denier David Irving, who is banned from entering Australia. A Foxtel representative blamed its airing on Zionist producers out to make them look bad.
- The conservative mayor of a Parisian suburb said he would suspend the use of a foul-smelling product to drive homeless people away from shopping centres after rights groups and politicians across the spectrum attacked the measure. The pungent smell was apparently French people walking past them with arms raised in the air.
- Two Chinese brothers who tunnelled their way out of a coal mine collapse after being trapped for nearly six days survived by eating coal and drinking urine, a local newspaper reported today. They said it wasn't that hard because they're served that meal by mine operators for lunch on Wednesday's and Thursday's.