Saturday, January 13, 2007

January 13 in the news....

  • The US embassy in Athens was yesterday pierced by an anti-tank shell in what Greek police called an "act of terrorism." It is being blamed on the close relations between the US and Turkey, some noted Greek scholars opining that 'We thought we had it all, but Turkish boys must appeal to them more, and it angers many Greeks'.

  • A school in Seattle has restricted viewings of Al Gore's global warming movie, with one parent saying "Condoms don't belong in school, and neither does Al Gore. He's not a schoolteacher." Al Gore's representatives tried to make a compromise for the school by replacing condoms with Al Gore as the driver of a hybrid car for all school dates.

  • Swedish file-sharing website The Pirate Bay is planning to buy its own nation in an attempt to circumvent international copyright laws. It will purchase Sealand, an island off the British coast. The island purchase marks an escalation in the determination geeks and nerds have to ensure the survival of viewing internet porn while listening to the Billboard Hot 100.

  • A poll today says the tide has turned on David Hicks. Most Australians say it's time he left his tiny cell in Guantanamo Bay. The Adelaide-born Hicks continues to be represented by Major Michael 'Dan' Mori, who many say has contributed to the turnaround in public sentiment. A spokesman for the conductor of the poll said: "People respect his uniform. And a lot of Australians have traditionally respected America - the symbol of justice, the symbol of democracy and freedom. And in a sense Mori is a symbol of the old America they used to respect and still respect." He went on "I mean, before Dan Mori, it was the Frog Brothers led by the unwavering and determined duo of Corey Feldman and Corey Haim."

  • British Prime Minister Tony Blair has put the blame for the sentiment towards the military campaigns in the Middle East on anti-war dissidents and the media. Warning it would take the West another 20 years to defeat Islamic terrorism, the Prime Minister used a wide-ranging "swansong" lecture on defence to denounce critics and the media who have been a thorn in his side since the invasion of Iraq. Conspicuously, the Prime Minister did not also blame the same suspects for the portrayal of British food to the world, and therefore refused to put a timeframe on improving its quality.

  • Surf Life Saving Australia has revealed that it is set to become part of the curriculum at more than 8500 schools across the country. Lesson #1 for surfing safety will continue to be the same as Lesson #10, which is 'Stay the fuck out of the ocean there's sharks in there!'

  • Scotland is preparing to mark 300 years since accepting the Treaty of Union with England - which bound two countries together and gave the world Great Britain. But the anniversary Tuesday of the Scottish parliament's voting to accept the treaty is focusing attention on growing discord, with advocates of Scottish independence gaining strength in their campaign for a referendum on breaking the union. It may reach a tipping point in the near future when Mel Gibson schedules his next holiday there and begins drinking on the streets of Glasgow.

  • Two 19-year-old men have been charged with affray and assault following an incident on Victoria's Mornington Peninsula. A Victorian Police spokeswoman said the men allegedly approached a group of tourists at a BP service station and started a fight. This is part of Victoria's continuing attempts to take their campaign of 'hate us now' from a states-based issue to a world-based one.

  • The gaffe-prone Muslim cleric Sheik Taj al-Din al-Hilali says he loves Australia and he will be returning despite politicians' calls for him to stay away. The cleric sparked controversy this week, when on an Egyptian chat show he labelled white Australians "liars" and said Muslims were more entitled to be in Australia than those with a convict heritage. In recent comments the Sheik said "I say many, many times. I taught - love Australia or leave it. Australia is still the best country in world. We're intelligent people, (the) Australia nation." He did not also note that it is a nation of wankers and he is in the running for the top prize this year.

  • More than 160 beach-goers were stung and two beaches were closed as a northerly wind change drove blue bottle jellyfish shorewards in south east Queensland. More than 100 people were stung at Noosa and Rainbow beach on the Sunshine Coast. Hospitals were inundated with victims and had to leave those suffering party drug problems in the waiting room.

  • In an exclusive interview with ABC News in Baghdad, Sen. Hillary Clinton, D-N.Y., called the situation in Iraq "heartbreaking". When asked about the situation in her marriage she noted that "The insurgency cannot be defeated, Bill is too much of a radical."