Saturday, November 21, 2009

Tales From America: The Nate Chronicles... Chapter I

"But whereunto shall I liken this generation?" - Jesus, Matthew 11:16

After a night of drinking in the belly of the redneck beast, I slumbered to the games room and dropped off. Awaking, I had to get my bearings, where was I again? I went downstairs and was greeted by Eli and Dr. Who.



Eli displays the faces he pulls against the yankee carpet baggers at the playground.

It was NFL Sunday. Later on in the day I would be exposed to the next level of American sporting fanaticism. The Tennessee Titans were playing the New England Patriots in Massachusetts and I had front row seats in deep Tennessee territory. This was significant because New England represented everything this Scots/Irish South resented. It was gonna be ugly. And, meanwhile, Josh was still trying to recover from the night before and act like he wasn't embarrassed at all.



This is it!

Nate was geared up. He had the Titans hat and the Titans t-shirt on. He forced me to sit down on the couch and recline back, it was time for something he does before every game. Al Pacino's speech from Any Given Sunday. As I watched the speech Nate paced back and forth in the loungeroom. Nothing was said. Pacino was speaking. Nate's breathing could be heard. This was a man on the TV talking about climbing out of hell one inch at a time, fighting one's way back to the light. Nate looked like he wanted to smash something out of inspiration. All because of Pacino. Al f***ing Pacino. At his best. "That's what living is!"

So the game started. Al Pacino would have committed suicide by half-time.

35-0.



"That's what living is!"

The second half unfolded, and this is what Pacino meant by not even standing one's face in the mirror. When you get old in life things get taken from you. Like Titans games! But you only learn that when you start losing stuff. Like Titans games!

59-0.

It was full time on NFL Sunday in Tennessee! Nate had outgrown his Titans t-shirt, which found a better place outside the backyard in a crumpled heap.



Nate post hat and t-shirt: I LOVE THE TENNESSEE TITANS WHEN THEY GET THEIR ARSE KICKED!

Night had fallen on this NFL Sunday and it was time for me and Josh to depart from Nate's Dickson County. Josh had to drive me back to Nashville then he was heading to Franklin. We got into a political debate on the drive, which consisted of me saying staunch unapologetic American conservatives are awesome and let's bomb aggressive scary brown foreigners who think our culture is evil cause we have to at least uphold their angry vision of us by beating them senseless as they believe white people enjoy doing this to them anyhow! This was followed by Josh's vigorous defences from the limited government Ron Paul side, it was only a 45 minute ride but we could have gone on a lot longer.

Once we had arrived back at the hotel, it was time to say goodbye. Josh was the one who had told me to fly through Nashville before going home, so I did. But the weekend had finished and he had to go back to work for the rest of the week, I was leaving on Friday. We probably weren't gonna see each other again, despite what was said. It was like the Chuck Norris goodbye in Firewalker.



"Watch your back."